Mama’s drinking wine tonight because her third child is driving her a little bit insane. Didn’t know I had a third child, did you? You thought I only had two precocious little girls, right? Yes, in addition to them, I also have a man child.
That’s right, I have a 38-year-old man child living in my home, though, to be fair, I usually just refer to him as my husband.
What did he do to force me to reveal his true man child identity? He messed with Mama’s Christmas ornaments. Like he’s the sort of mischievous Elf on the Shelf that
bored as hell creative moms have living in their house.
I bought some fun, festive LED-lit letters this week to jazz up our dining room with some Christmas spirit. I left the room for one minute. ONE MINUTE. And this is what I come back to.
He then proceeded to talk about how great it would be if we had a friend named Leon. He was dead serious.
Glass of wine poured.